June 16, 2013

Hiatus

butterfly bush mol

Due to unforeseen circumstances, I’m going to take a break from posting on my blog for awhile. I promise I’ll be back. Have a wonderful summer!

 

June 13, 2013

Hospital Adventure

Last week the six-year-old came down with another stomach virus – his third this year.  When my poor child suffers as much as he does with these wicked viruses, I wish it would be me instead of him. For some reason, he’s the only one in the family who gets it in the stomach. My youngest and I suffered only from the common cold.

Our doctor is the best. He lets us call him, and he’ll talk us through it, or call in a prescription, which we did on the first day, but this time the medicine for nausea didn’t help, so the next morning before any of us were prepared to start the day, we went down to his office, and my husband carried in the six-year-old.

We were spared our usual long wait. When you have a child who can’t walk and can barely talk, it’s an urgent case, and from the doctor’s office, we were sent to the hospital’s outpatient services.

Our three-year-old was with us all day too, and he was the best child in the world. I’m not quite sure what he was thinking, but he knew his brother was very sick. Later, when I told him his brother was getting better, he bounced up and down, and exclaimed, “Yay!”

At the hospital, I felt surprisingly calm. I knew we were in the right place, and I knew the nurses and staff would do everything they needed to do to help my son. The IV would keep him hydrated, which was so difficult and stressful to do at home since he couldn’t keep anything down.

Our doctor requested an X-rayed of his stomach and did some blood work to rule out anything more serious since my son keeps catching these nasty bugs. I felt extremely grateful that they found nothing, and once again I’m humbled to think that there are so many parents who aren’t so lucky.

We didn’t expect to have to spend the night, but our son wasn’t well enough when our doctor came to visit him after his office hours.  So my son and I camped out at the hospital together. Luckily he was feeling a little better by the early evening, and from then on, we called it our “hospital adventure.” The bonus was getting to watch “The Lion King” alone with mommy.

My praise and gratitude go to all the health professionals that we encountered during our brief stay.  It’s not the first time I’ve slept at a hospital, and every experience has yielded the same thoughts: hospital staff, especially the nurses, are the most incredible people. They are truly the caretakers of the world.

One of our daytime nurses, Matt, was kind, funny and talkative, and though my six-year-old could barely respond to him when Matt put the IV in his arm, I know his humor helped put my son at ease. It put me at ease!

Our night nurse was the best. Elizabeth was warm and just like a mother. She didn’t even seem tired at the end of her shift.  When she wheeled the cot into the room for me to sleep in, I tried to help her make it up, but she shooed me away. “That’s my job! You rest, Mama.” She politely scolded me.

Even in the hallways, my son was greeted with smiles and sympathy, and I know perhaps the staff is coached to be friendly, but that doesn’t mean they all will be. People who go into the health profession do so because they are suited for the work. (I know I couldn’t do it.)

In the morning when Elizabeth came to tell me they were doing a shift change, and she would be going home, I told her she had been a wonderful nurse. She wagged her finger at me.

“No, no…I’m paid to do that,” she said.  Of course, I know that. But while I believe you can pay someone to do a good job, you can’t pay them to exude warmth and a genuine concern for other people. Some people are just more talented and kind.

Luckily for me, every time I’ve left a hospital, I’ve left with my health and the health of those around me. I know life may not always yield this blessing, but for now I will breath in a sigh of relief and say, “Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.”

Wishing you all good health.

June 11, 2013

Worthy Reads

First of all, congratulations to the Barrow Journal for winning the Georgia Press Association’s 2013 General Excellence Award for the second year in a row. 

Homeschooling

Four Reasons to Quit School and Become a Teenage Homeschooler - Huffington Post

Homeschooling Hiccups: Challenges Outside the Box - onislam.net – It’s nice to read a homeschooling article from the other side of the world and know that their houses look like tornados too! ;)

At-home classrooms filling up – World Magazine

Homeschool enrollment explodes – American Thinker

Homeschooled Kids Aren’t Freaks or Deprived, and Stereotypes Against Them Need to Go – policymic – This article doesn’t say anything new to homeschoolers (like most of them), but it’s a very good article if you need evidence for the skeptics in your life.

The Unintended Consequences of Granting Homeschooling Family Asylum – The American Spectator – I thought it was interesting to finally see an article by a very conservative paper arguing against granting asylum  to the Romeikes. 

Parenting

The Milestones That Matter Most – Huff Post Parents

Why Alone Time Is So Important for Boys and Girls – Huff Post Parents – I love this so much I think I’ll have to write an article about it. via Camp Creek.

June 6, 2013

Events for Kids & News for Homeschoolers

{Winder, Georgia} {Athens, Georgia} {Georgia homeschooling law changes 2013}

Note: This column was published in the Barrow Journal on June 5, 2013.

Here are a few odds and ends for parents and homeschoolers as you begin your summer vacation:

Georgia House Bill 283 was amended so that homeschoolers no longer have to submit attendance forms to the Georgia Department of Education. Last year the bill was amended so that homeschoolers no longer needed to submit their forms to local school districts. Now we report directly to the Georgia Department of Education, and with this new change, all we are required to submit to the state is a Declaration of Intent to homeschool.

Recently I spoke with Patrick Blenke, Program Manager of Curriculum and Instruction, and he confirmed that this law will take effect July 1, 2013.  Any homeschooler whose school year ends after July 1st as stated on your Declaration of Intent does not need to submit attendance forms. He did make it clear that homeschoolers still need to track attendance and must have 180 days of instruction.

Home study programs must include instruction in reading, language arts, mathematics, social studies and science, but may include more. We are also required to administer a standardized test every three years starting in the third grade, and write an annual progress report, but these items don’t have to be submitted to the state either. If a child is homeschooled and then enrolled in a public school, these records may prove useful.

For the complete law on homeschooling go to the Georgia Department of Education’s website: http://www.doe.k12.ga.us/Curriculum-Instruction-and-Assessment/Pages/Home-Schools.aspx

  • Whether you homeschool or not, you may be interested in checking out the new Atlanta Homeschool magazine. It’s full of great travel information and activities to do with kids, and of course, it’s full of advice for homeschoolers as well!  You can subscribe to receive a print edition, or you can read it online for free: http://www.atlanta-homeschool.com

Here are a couple of items you can find on the web that you might enjoy too:

  • If you are a space buff, you probably already know about Commander Chris Hadfield, who wowed the world recently with his rendition of David Bowie’s “Space Oddity” from the International Space Station (ISS). Commander Hadfield posted several educational videos and photographs during his recent five-month mission on the ISS. My six-year-old especially loved the video he did of wringing out a washcloth in zero gravity, and your children probably will too. You can see all of Commander Hadfield’s videos and photos on his Twitter feed at https://twitter.com/Cmdr_Hadfield.
  • If your kid is a nature lover like mine, you’ll be interested to know that we are raising a second generation of butterflies (I wrote a column about our first generation a few weeks ago), and they are almost ready to turn into butterflies! You can see photos of the whole life cycle on my Facebook page, if you’re interested. It’s a public page, so you don’t have to join Facebook to see the photos: https://www.facebook.com/mamaofletters. Of course, I’ll write about our adventure with the butterflies when we’re finished.

Please add any other event information or online resources for kids in the comments section below.

June 4, 2013

I Need Your Help Creating a Resource Guide on Storytelling for Parents.

The Boyhood of Raleigh 1870 by Sir John Everett Millais, Bt 1829-1896

The Boyhood of Raleigh by Sir John Everett Millais (click image for info)

I am a storytelling advocate, and I consider it my job to convince parents to make up stories and use the oral tradition as part of their parenting repertoire. 

This year I’ve been working on a resource for parents to help them do this. It will include at least the following:

  • Why Should Parents Tell Their Children Stories
  • The Benefits of Storytelling
  • Examples of Stories
  • Interviews with Storytellers
  • An Easy Guide On How To Tell Stories

As I’ve been brainstorming for my resource, it has occurred to me that parents will be most convinced of the power of storytelling if they hear stories from adults who are remembering the storytellers of their childhoods.  This is where you come in.

  • Did someone tell you stories when you were a child? How do you remember that person? Do you remember the stories, or do you remember how they made you feel?  Please tell me about it.
  • In addition to this, I’d like to hear from parents who are telling stories to their children now. How do you come up with your stories? When do you tell them? How do your children receive them?  Please share your experiences with me.

You can leave a comment below, or you can e-mail me at shellipabis at gmail dot com. I also would appreciate it if you shared this page with your friends, especially those people that you know loves stories!

Anyone who is quoted in my book/resource will be acknowledged, and I’ll be happy to include your blog URL, if you have one.

What I can’t promise is a speedy delivery of this resource. This is my long-term project, and it’s happening in slow moving spurts as I homeschool and care for my family full-time as well as write a weekly column. If you’d like to see what I’ve already written about storytelling, you can go to my Storytelling Page.

Thank you! Together we can make the world a better place by advocating storytelling.

May 30, 2013

Making Memories

Note: This column was published in the Barrow Journal on May 29, 2013.

My husband and I are getting a kick out of watching Everybody Loves Raymond on Netflix. Not only is the show’s audience geared to families with young children such as ours, we have quite a bit in common with Raymond’s family, including having in-laws of European descent.

Recently we watched an episode when the overworked and exasperated wife of Raymond yells at him for not spending enough time with the kids. She tells him that he should be part of their children’s childhood memories and ends her lecture by yelling, “Put those golf clubs down and make some damn memories!”

Moms desperately want what’s best for our kids, but we aren’t always able to live up to the ideal mom who never gets frustrated and never yells. Sometimes I worry about the mom that my children will remember.

Will they remember me as a cheerful mom who liked to play Trouble, create scavenger hunts and paint pictures with them? Will they remember me as the mom who was hopeless in the kitchen and heated up frozen pizza more than I care to admit? Will they remember a tired, grumpy mom, or worse, a mom who kept saying, “I’ll be there in a minute,” but really took fifteen minutes to finish her work on the computer.

“You’re always on the computer,” my son said once. Ouch.

Then I tried to think back to my childhood.  Don’t I have good memories? I vividly remember the bad things like my parent’s divorce or losing friends at school who found buddies they thought made a better friend than me. Where are my good memories? My tired brain searched. Why is it so much easier to remember the bad stuff?

But then I found them, smiling behind the murky clouds of a normal kid’s up and down life.

I remember my mom buying me a pet parakeet, and I named him Bo. We kept his cage in the corner of the sunroom, and I tried to teach him how to say “hello.”

Sometimes my mom would let me bring him into the master bedroom where we’d lay on my parent’s king size bed to watch T.V. together. We’d let him fly free through the room, and he loved to sit up on the chain of a hanging lamp. Then we would pat the bed, and say, “Come here. Come here.” He would fly down to the bed and prance around between us.

I was never able to teach him how to say “hello,” but he learned to say “come here.” He lived for 12 years too.

I also remember my mother tickling me on that giant bed, and I remember listening to her read Helen Keller. I remember the afternoon she picked me up from school and handed me a copy of Where the Sidewalk Ends, which she bought just for me because she knew I loved it.

I also remember my mom warming my jackets by an electric heater before I walked out into the freezing Colorado snow to catch the bus, and I remember the extra special prom dresses that she spent way too much money on, but I appreciated that so much.

I can remember not understanding why my mom would sigh so much every time I interrupted her (oh I understand now!), but I also remember her smile.

Nowadays I try to remember not to beat myself up when my son complains that I’m not at his beckon call. After all, he tends to forget that I spend several hours with him and his brother every morning doing school or his self-initiated projects or sometimes playing games.

He forgets that I often spend the evenings outside with him in the garden and watching him play and that every night I lay with him for half an hour to chat and tell stories. He doesn’t know that usually when I’m at my computer I’m either planning or recording our days together.

When he’s an adult, I’m hoping his long-term memory will be better than his short-term memory is now. I don’t want him to remember me as a perfect mom, but I hope he’ll think back and remember that I tried my best, and I liked cooking up a lot of fun too.

How do you think your children will remember you?

May 28, 2013

Marking the End of the Year – Do Homeschoolers Really Have To?

For parents whose children are in school, the beginning of summer can cause mixed emotions. Suddenly your children are at home full-time, and your uninterrupted time during the day is over. For homeschoolers, there is usually no change in routine, though some parents may go lighter on the school work during the summer or cease altogether.

Having grown up going to traditional school, it’s in my psyche to mark the beginning and end of each year. That’s why recently I decided that I would look over my son’s progress, decide on a stopping point and give him a Kindergarten graduation during the first week of June – right before the summer camps begin. (Summer camps make our summers the busiest time of the year.)

As soon as I put this self-imposed deadline on myself, I felt my blood pressure rise. To “finish” school work that’s ongoing, and to put together the slideshow and progress report that I like to have ready for our “graduation” on top of all my other household, childcare and writing that I do – that’s a lot. I don’t take many breaks as it is. If anything, sitting down to write my column is a break, but it’s just different work. For a stay-at-home mom, “different” and “sitting quietly” can sometimes feel restful, but not always.

I’m getting better at realizing when I’m being stupid. Almost as soon as I started to feel overwhelmed by all that extra “work,” I stopped it and then some. I took my first break from writing my column (ever), and I stopped worrying about doing a Kindergarten graduation. I’ll still do one, but it’ll be whenever – June or July – who cares? Because…

We’re homeschoolers!  This is one of the reasons I wanted to homeschool – for the flexibility and relaxed lifestyle.

How relaxed is it if I keep giving myself deadlines? I’m not a lazy person. I get an amazing amount of work done. I don’t need to make it worse by adding my own deadlines.

So eventually I’ll write our end of the year review, about my record keeping this year, and about our Kindergarten graduation, but it’s not going to happen all at once. It’ll happen when it happens.

But guess what? Since I took away my “deadline” I have actually made very good progress on some of these goals. Yep, things get done well even when you impose a relaxed and easy manner.

Note: If you’re looking for ideas about how you can mark the end of your school year, you might want to refer to the post I wrote last year about our pre-Kindergarten graduation. I’ll be doing something similar this year when we get around to it.

However, you don’t have to do any of that. Do it if you want to. (I like stuff like this.) Do it if you think your children would enjoy it. But the purpose of homeschooling should be to create the life you want for yourself and your family. 

Don’t mark occasions that would add more stress to your life. Mark the occasions that celebrate the life you’re living.

I challenge you to get rid of those self-imposed deadlines and relax…about everything! And then come tell me about it. :)

May 23, 2013

Garden Inheritance

Note: This column was published in the Barrow Journal on May 22, 2013.

When I was a young girl I came to Georgia to visit my grandmother who lived in Athens. She kept a little red watering can just for me because I loved to help her water her plants. She lived in an apartment, but it had a courtyard where she grew flowers. Red geraniums were her favorite.

I used to love walking with her to Charmar nursery where I was enchanted with the rows and rows of plants inside the long greenhouse. Once she bought a little green fern for me, and I took it home on the airplane.

When we lived in Colorado, our house had a sunroom, and my mother filled it with Scheffleras, spider plants and jades.  I remember watching my father tend the garden that ran along the back fence. In my childhood memory that garden was very big, but it was probably just a modest house garden.

During my year in Japan, I had a very tiny apartment, but it had a small balcony, so it seemed natural to follow in my mother and grandmother’s footsteps and fill it with greenery. It was the least I could do to improve the view of the parking lot.

Now my children have inherited this love of plants and gardening. My six-year-old saves the seeds from his mandarins and apples and wants to plant them to see if they’ll grow. He found a half-sprouted acorn in the yard, so now we have a hardwood tree growing in a pot despite the fact that we have more than enough growing in our yard.

Every night he faithfully waters our garden where we planted green beans, tomatoes, cucumbers, lettuce and a few herbs. He likes watering our flowers in the front yard too, but I always offer to help because I don’t want it to become a chore for him.

My three-year-old loves to water and plant too.  One afternoon he carried seeds around from some plant found in the woods. His grubby little hands offered them to me, and they ended up in the cup holder of my chair. He, too, has an acorn growing in a pot, thanks to the help of his older brother.

A friend of mine owns a landscaping business, and she taught my son how take a cutting from the butterfly bush. Cut off one of the new shoots, strip the bottom leaves and cut the top leaves in half. Put the remaining part into a small pot with some seed starter mix, keep it moist and in a sunny spot.  Now my son is pulling the new leaves off the bush to try it himself. Come here in a few years, and you’ll probably find our yard full of purple butterfly bushes.

I’m making no attempts to stop my budding gardeners even though a landscaper might cringe at our attempts to grow full-sun plants in the shade or crowd the flowers together. My education in gardening has been through trial and error, and my sons are following in my footsteps.

Whenever I watch my three-year-old stoop over to water a pot with his blue watering tin, I think about the little red one I had at my grandmother’s. I think she would be pleased that I’m still outside planting, watering, and growing seeds. Someday I’ll have to take my boys on a trip to a big greenhouse too.

May 21, 2013

Inspire Kids: Space Oddity

Okay, so I know you’ve already seen this. It’s gone viral, and it’s been in the news. But how could I not add it to my Inspire Kids series? Chris Hadfield has been a wonderful role model for children by creating all sorts of YouTube videos during his five months as commander of Expedition 35 at the International Space Station. I posted one in my Inspire Kids already that I especially like, and you can find more on YouTube.  Both of my sons loved watching this as I’m sure everyone has.

The vocals were really recorded in space! This is his version of David Bowie’s 1969 “Space Oddity.”

He just returned to Earth last week. Thanks for all your hard work, Commander Hadfield.

(If you subscribe to my blog by e-mail, you may have to view this post on the Internet to see the video.)

pink columbines You can view all of our Inspire Kids videos by clicking on the Inspire Kids tag. If my six-year-old likes it, then maybe your children will too!

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